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Dani is finding that taking her vitamins might just be doing the trick

I feel quite inspired. It may be the vitamin B I’m taking. I think I said already that I think it’s making a difference and now I’m quite sure of the fact. It could be because I am thinking a bit clearer. It could be because I feel like I understand myself a bit better, or it could be because that Aero advert is back on TV. But whatever it is, I am happy it’s happened.

At first, I was quite confused about how to deal with the fact that I was waking up and feeling normal. Well, the hard part wasn’t dealing with it, so much as actually recognising that what I was feeling was normality. After a year of feeling like I’m waking up standing on the edge of a cliff it has been oddly hard to suddenly be waking up okay.

I’m not saying that everything is great all the time, but for the past week or two things have just been easier. It feels like a bit of a weight has been lifted. I am now making decisions about what I want to be doing in a year or five years and it’s taking some time to get used to it. It’s insane isn’t it, who would have ever thought that anyone would have to try and get used to feeling normal? Although I imagine lots of people experience that feeling, after suffering from an illness or going through a tragedy eventually you will start to feel normal. But I think I’m being sensible about it, I’m not expecting too much from myself. I am trying not to get my hopes up too high, because there will be downfalls, and there have already been a couple times where I feel bad again, but the turnaround seems to be a bit quicker.

“I got on two buses in one week, one of which I did on my own”

Even when things have upset me, it hasn’t affected my nerves as it would have done. If I was going to go deeper into it, I would say that perhaps the reason it hasn’t affected me so badly is because I’m not that bothered anymore, but lets not go there! Going there might give us the result that, in actual fact, I’m not actually better, it’s just the fact that the things that would have really hurt before have hurt so many times that now I’m numb from them.

Maybe that whole ‘if you put good ‘vibes’ out you get good ‘vibes’ back’ thing is true. I felt good, bought a lotto ticket and won a tenner. Not quite the 20 grand I wanted, but still, it’s a plus. I realise it’s quite ridiculous to say that I won £10 on the lottery because I’m taking vitamin B but like I said, I’m feeling inspired!

I want to go out to work so I can save for all the things I have planned for next year. I am learning to drive and can just about do a three-point turn. I got on two buses in one week, one of which I did on my own, which may sound like one of the most trivial, stupid things ever but for me it felt like I had conquered the world. Even when I sent a text message to everyone I know who realises what it means and never got one back, I didn’t care. What might be an everyday thing to you was a mountain to me, and I bloody well climbed it!

Soho draws the art lovers in for a star-studded auction

It’s currently high season on the UK art scene, with more art fairs, gallery openings, and general creative ‘happenings’ than you can shake a canapé at. But by far the hottest ticket in London so far this year has been the Lazarides Soho Auction, which made its unforgettable debut in the capital last week.

Held at exclusive gay nightspot The Shadow Lounge on Brewer Street, the basic premise of the event was as follows. They took one Basquiat, three Warhols, some new pieces by Banksy and Damien Hirst, and threw in an incredible range of artworks by some of the UK’s most popular urban artists, and then put it all up for auction in front of a specially invited audience of 200 leading art buyers.

But this was an auction with a difference, because also on hand were some buxom burlesque beauties, complete with nipple tassles and showgirl plumes, who kept the audience glued to their seats for the duration.

As I was lucky enough to be promoting the auction itself, I lost no time in assembling a cadre of paparazzi photographers and staking out the celeb-studded event from neighbouring gay bar Village. Imagine the snappers’ delight, then, when I looked up and pointed out a young girl with a very distinctive beehive hairstyle walking down the street outside. That’s right; it was none other than ‘Rehab’ singer Amy Winehouse, looking as skinny as ever and clutching a packet of fags in one hand.

Quicker than you can say “Look at the birdie!”, the four photographers we were sitting with leapt to their feet and hightailed it outside and down the street in hot pursuit, leaving me and Will from my office sitting there alone at a table with six drinks on it!

But it seemed our spotting of the Winehouse was just an aperitif, as news of the auction had drawn half the celeb population of London to Soho, a bit like moths swarming round a bright light. Hollywood child actress and self-confessed Banksy mega-fan Mary-Kate Olsen was one of the first to arrive, grabbing a seat in the front row and having her leather ‘spanking paddle’ ready to hold up whenever she wanted to bid for a lot.

Not far behind was legendary US actor Dennis Hopper, who spent most of the auction taking snaps of the lots with his digital camera… or was he taking shots of the big-boobed burlesque dancers who were carrying the paintings in? No, no, it was probably the art!

There were famous faces everywhere: musician Paul Young, presenter Jamie Theakston, and Lord Andrew Lloyd-Webber, who I must confess looked less than amused when we started humming the theme to The Phantom of The Opera within earshot. There goes my casting call to be his next Maria!

But the real stars of the show were the artworks themselves, which went from anywhere between £20,000 to an astonishing £600,000. Of course, I’m not allowed to say who bid for what, but I will say this: it’s a very lucrative time to be an artist!

Jo Brooks is director of Brighton-based PR company JBPR Ltd,
01273 622555, www.jb-pr.com

Victoria Nangle has a quick chat with Sandra Bernhard before her Worthing gig

Hi Sandra, how are you today?
I’m kickin’ and jammin’ and running all over New York City, recording an album and grocery shopping all in the same day!

It’s great to see you return to international stand-up. Why did you leave it for so long?
Because I have a nine-year-old daughter. I have been preoccupied raising her. I’ve been busy Stateside working on various projects as well as touring with a variety of my one-woman shows. I’ve been sorely missed and I’ve missed being there so that’s why I’m finally getting back.

What do you love most about stand-up?
The interaction with the audience. The immediacy of the response. Taking on issues of the day. And tearing it apart.

What advice would you give to any aspiring female comics?
Have a unique point-of-view and a sense of fearlessness.

“If I had a day off I’d run around with Kate Moss and Pete Doherty and get into trouble”

Many first saw you acting in Roseanne. What are your strongest memories of working on the show?
Working with a stellar cast and having one of the best times I’ve ever had, with a crazy group of people.

Will you meet up with Madonna while you’re over in Blighty?
Our mutual appointment books are filled with each other.

What would you do with one day off in the UK?
Run around with Kate Moss and Pete Doherty and get into a whole mess of trouble!

Will you explore the British gay scene?
No, but they will explore me.

What brought you to perform in Worthing?
Madness and mayhem and a nice cup of tea.

Fancy a pint of beer after the show?
Of course, but can you cover a thousand of my closest friends?

Sandra Bernhard, Worthing Pavilion Theatre, Wednesday 24 October. All tickets £19.50 (plus £1 fee per ticket for card bookings). Show starts at 8pm.
Call box office on 01903 206206.

Cutural provocateur Jimmy Cauty has been making mischief for over 20 years now and is best known for his work with KLF who pulled off some of the most audacious and successful scams, stunts and publicity coups known to mankind, including the infamous burning of a million quid episode. Generally (and rather ironically) shy of the limelight, Cauty however is still a busy bee, but mostly in the art studio these days, and recently scored some more direct hits with his Stamps of Mass Destruction series. This exhibition charts the last four years of his existence living and breathing in up-and-coming Portslade.

Jimmy Cauty: The Rize And Fall Of The Portslade Massif, until 3rd November 2007, Ink_d Gallery, 96 North Road, Brighton, 01273 645299.