This week Katie quaffs free champagne and munches canapés with the glitterati
It’s January so nobody is drinking, except for the journalists.
We’re wandering from party to party with no celebs in sight (anyone with any money has the sense to stay inside in this weather), draining free champagne just to make the time pass quicker.
The only story in London seems to be Kate Moss’s birthday, but there’s no chance of finding it so instead we’re taking what’s on offer.
On Monday night I find myself at The Wallace Collection watching the presentation of the T. S. Eliot prize for poetry.
The building is an imposing traditional pile in the centre of London and all around me are guests dressed up to the nines for their big party of the year.
I look a mess. As it’s my first week back at work after the New Year, I have celebrated by staying up drinking whisky until 5am with N. and now, the evening after a long day’s work, I’m not feeling too clever.
“After a sleuth of free champagne, N and I are in the mood to carry on and by 2am we’re falling out of a pub in Soho, more than a little worse for wear”
But still, the canapés are miniburgers. I’m glad I came.
When the presentation’s over I quickly grab Margaret Hodge (the minister for culture) and ask her why the Arts Council has had their funding cut.
“It’s just crap PR”, she starts, and my ears prick up. She’s standing a bit too close to me and talking very fast. I wonder if she’s drunk as she continues toroll off a series of loose-tongued comments that, considering she knows I’m a journalist, I’m sure she shouldn’t be telling me.
I nod and grin and try to look stupid. Ask more questions. Try to look more stupid. Then as soon as she’s finished and I’m out of sight, I scribble down every word that she said, rush home, and file the lot off to my editor.
On Tuesday, Granta magazine is celebrating their 100th issue. The bash is heaving with a variety of authors and journalists all getting impressively drunk in the shambling ruins of a Notting Hill theatre.
Harold Pinter shows his face but is soon lurching back out the door after a five minute run-in with a Daily Mail journalist.
I suspect she got as far as ”Hi I’m from the Daily Mail” – or, at least I did last time I tried him. Across the room I’m not having much better luck with Martin Amis. He’s brushed off my greeting with a hasty, stern faced ”no thanks”.
Hasn’t this guy got a book to promote? Surely he must need some publicity?

Apparently he does. As I walk away I catch a whiff of smoke as he’s sparked a cigarette inside the hall. Seconds later the flashes of the photographers start – and he’s guaranteed himself a mention in every national paper tomorrow.
On Wednesday I run from Selfridges (a party for Dunhill) along to Natasha Law’s exhibition (Jude’s sister) to a book launch held in the private rooms of The Royal Academy.
After a sleuth of free champagne, N. and I are in the mood to carry on and by two in the morning we’re falling out of a pub in Soho – more than a little worse for wear.
“There’s a club called Punk just around the corner where I can get us guest list”, I suggest. But N’s looking broken. He kisses me goodbye, hails me a cab, and packs me off home reminding me that I’ll have to be back in the office for ten.
I make it in on time, only a little rumpled, and have a flick through the papers.
There’s Kate Moss’s party, at Punk nightclub. And in the background a taxi – that I’m probably pulling away in.