» Dani’s Diary
Dani finds choosing between her job and self-respect an easy choice
I never make New Year’s resolutions. I think the whole concept is a little weird and pointless as you can’t foretell what your year is going to bring and therefore can’t decide to resolve things that may become harder or imperative in the future. Although I don’t make resolutions, I try and think of the beginning of a new year as a benchmark and try and decide what I want to be, where I want to be and what I want to have gained by the end of that year.
The things I think of are never really all that outlandish or over the top. I try my best to outwardly aim for realistic things, on the inside I dream a bit too far, but that can’t be helped.
This year I am not really sure what I am aiming for. I want to live more than anything. I want to love, learn, laugh and cry. But that never changes year from year, only this time round I would like to do slightly less of the crying bit.
I made a start on my 2009 action plan in December when I handed in my notice at the job I have stuck out for a year. I have nothing definite to head to from there but I am so happy with my choice. A choice between a monthly pay cheque or my self-respect was an easy one to make.
“I have paid my debts for stealing penny sweets when I was little and can now move forward feeling a bit more wiser and free“
But where do I go from here? The world is my oyster and I don’t know which way to head in!
I am thinking of giving writing a proper crack. I have said before that my coming to write this column was an accident. Up until recently, I never really felt anything about writing. It was always something I did but never had any confidence in. Now, however, I am starting to think a little more positively.
Why not, eh? Why shouldn’t I at least try to do something that would make me proud of myself?
A new year, a new beginning, and I have so much faith that this year will bring me everything I need. And if it doesn’t, I will make it. I firmly believe that positive thought is the way to go. You have to when you have drawn the short straw as many times as I have. I am hoping that the hell which was 2008, 2007 and 2006 will have all been leading up to something amazing and that my life is now officially allowed to start.
No more nerves, no more heartbreak, no more drama. I really don’t think that is too much to ask. I have paid my debts for stealing penny sweets when I was little and can now move forward feeling a bit more wiser and free. There is so much I want to do and so much I am yet to feel. I have complete faith that the universe will arrange something extraordinary for me. I will be the first to admit that I have never had to really try for very much, there must be some reason for this.
All those bigger fish I have to fry will slowly start to appear, and if I am honest, I can’t wait.
