Malone on the woes of food allergies
The internet has told me to drink baking soda so I have. I wonder what else I would do if the internet told me to do it. I can hear my mum saying “Would you jump off a cliff if Google told you to?” No, I wouldn’t do that, but I am willing to glug a bitter drink to make my face look less swollen.
Yes, I’m still having allergy reactions. While conferring with Dr Google (he tells me he is not a doctor and any advice he passes onto me is not his own opinion nor is he responsible for any of my own actions after the passing on of information that he has sourced…) I’m led to a website that advises baking soda can help alleviate the symptoms of allergy symptoms from food allergies, especially with chemical intolerances like I have.
“I’ve been a rice-eating rake for weeks”
After many weeks of avoiding wheat, dairy, tomatoes, chilli, potatoes,
(I’m half irish, I can handle the rest; but potatoes!?!) I finally realise that it has been the ‘natural’ food colouring in my dairy free margarine – E160a – Annatto. Think I have finally sussed it! Last night I devoured my long lost love – a simple ham sandwich (gluten free over-priced roll and dairy free annatto free spread) Oh, how wonderful it was to eat something normal like a ham sandwich! I’ve been a rice-eating rake for weeks. I’ve lost weight just because I can’t be bothered to wash a pan up to boil rice that often… And I’m too vain, it seems, to start eating normal food again, in case my face swells out again like elephant lady.
Elephants are good in story books, but no-one wants an elephant for a mum. My eyelids triple in size and I look like a cocky wannabe wearing massive sunglasses on a dark rainy morning on the school run. Little do they know I am hiding the beast face… The antihistamines don’t work to reduce the swelling, but they are an excellent cure for being awake and focused during the day…The other day I fell asleep dreaming the doorbell was ringing, I was pinned to the bed unable to move. That’s prescription antihistamines. You fall asleep and dream about being asleep.
This means my flat constantly resembles a scene from a burglary where the burglar had a few days to look for the hidden family jewels. Everything is pulled out and strewn everywhere. I can just about muster enough energy to put my sunglasses on for the school run and google ‘blummin allergy’. So today when googling medical help (I’ve found the
NHS limited for food intolerances help.) I found a site suggesting I drink bicarbonate of soda to alkalize my body. I wonder what I will do next?
Don’t worry, I won’t jump off that cliff if it tells me too… But I might fall off if I am taking antihistamines and operating machinery!