Ruby Grimshaw retreats into silent meditation

When I said to friend G that I was going away on a week’s retreat she looked at me sideways and a glazed look appeared in her eyes.
“That’s nice,” she said doubtfully. “Ruby’s finally lost it,” is what she wanted to say.
Yet a week in the country, for the most part in silence, is a most relaxing thing to do, especially just before the frantic activity of Christmas. I went in November, during that beautiful week of mild weather, when the woods wore the soft oranges and yellows of autumn and one could stride through carpets of leaves without getting cold or wet.
It was my fourth Buddhist retreat, and my most challenging.
At 6.30am a little bell tinkled telling us to get up for the first of four two hour sessions of meditation.

“As long as I could grab a hot cup of coffee before we started I felt I could survive”

so brushing my teeth became a cursory affair. At first I found it very difficult to concentrate on my breathing as my thoughts would leap all over the place. But by the end of the week the sound of the gong for the end of the session would surprise me.
On the second day we became silent, and interestingly, there was a freedom in not having to make polite conversation. All 21 one of us shared the chores of serving meals and tidying up, and it was surprising how far a nod and a smile could go. The food was vegetarian and absolutely delicious. Eating as we did in silence the meals were served up, gobbled up and then washed up well inside half an hour.

In an emergency we were allowed to break the silence. When I discovered that I had forgotten to bring my hair dryer I wondered if allowing one’s hair to dry naturally could be classed as a case of life or death. I approached a few people and gesticulated at my head, as in a game of charades, but a hair dryer did not appear.

My favourite chore was preparing the vegetables in the afternoon and taking the cuttings down the road to feed six pet pigs. They would come charging across the field squealing and snuffling with delight when they saw us and it was impossible not to join in vocally with their joy.

I have tried to keep the sense of calm I achieved from that week and am definitely driving slower, and hopefully, more patiently. G says she can’t see any difference.