Bare Cheek: Facebook round-up
We take a look at the things doing the rounds in Facebook so you don’t have to
Someone wants you sign a petition to stop something happening somewhere.
A picture of a puppy looking sad who will magically be made happy if you “like” the picture.
Piece of terrible, sub-”you don’t have to be mad to work here but it helps!” piece of would-be wisdom about the government that you remember first hearing in 1983.
Someone else wants you to sign another petition that directly contradicts the earlier petition.
Obviously photoshopped sign from a foreign country that says something a bit rude.
Picture from 1995 of someone you barely know.
Map of the world illustrating some statistic (e.g. “99% of the world’s population never travel more than 200 yards from their own doorstep”) that is obviously made up.
Supposedly-true “heartwarming” story about something a little kid did that does not bear up to close scrutiny.
Photo of a packet of Ringos with lots of little pictures of Ringo Starr’s face replacing the crisps, that has, bafflingly, been “liked” by over four billion people.
Housewife looks 20 years younger with this “simple trick”. Apparently.
Petition to stop something happening that isn’t actually happening anyway, e.g. “stop Iranian scientists firing live kittens into the sun with giant catapults!!!”
The joke about the man in the bath, the hot-water bottle, and the butler called “Biddle” (Copyright Barry Cryer 1935)
Quotation from H.L.Mencken attributed to Oscar Wilde.
Ooh look – someone has 500 iPads he’s giving away. He cannot sell them, you see, because the boxes have been opened and, as we all know, items that have had their boxes opened cannot be sold anywhere, even eBay.
Quotation from George Bernard Shaw attributed to Dorothy Parker.
Short film clip of a fat American man in pyjamas falling over while collecting his morning paper and presumably fracturing his spine.
Dog biting man dressed as Elvis on bum.
Bus names
Their connections to the local area explained.
FAT WALLETT
A porcelain money bank modelled on the unimginatively-named animated character from the long-running ‘Access’ advertising campaign recently sold for £15 at the Oxfam on Western Road.
BADEN-POWELL
There are now numerous ‘Scout Huts’, forming part of the movement founded by the hero of the Siege of Mafeking, in the local area.
EDIE SEDGWICK
Used to sell reclaimed fireplaces out of a lock-up on Upper Gardner St.
ED ‘STEWPOT’ STEWART
According to the official fansite, the former Radio 1 DJ hosted more Radio 1 Roadshows from Brighton than any other former Radio 1 DJ.
THE MUSKEHOUNDS
Chair, Secretary and Treasurer of the Porslade Chamber of Commerce, 1976-1988.
Follow me: @MitchellnNixon
