Tasha Dhanraj explains the rules of the game

So, Facebook has introduced this new thing to go with their funky new timelines and their cool new layout. This new thing is the Facebook “Cover Photo”. As far as I can tell, it is Facebook taking a leaf out of the old Myspace’s book. (Do you remember Myspace? It was that thing that your trendy friends were telling you to get about five years ago. Legend has it that if you stand at the very bottom of Silicon Valley on a full moon then you can still hear the echoes
of the screams of emotional turmoil from its founder.)
Well, anyway, so they’ve introduced this new thing that means you can have a banner at the top of your profile that can be whatever you like.

Mine is a picture of a teddy bear wearing a party hat.

It is amazing.
As I work in social media, I thought I would give you a guide to how to pick your own new cover photo to both maximise coolness and aesthetic appeal.
Rule number one: don’t make it a picture of yourself. Honestly, unless somebody fancies you, nobody on the planet gives a hoot about seeing you with two different haircuts.
Rule number two: don’t make it a picture of you with all your friends. If you do that in a desperate bid to appear more popular, all anybody will think is “Aww, they’re so unpopular that they have to convince people they are popular through their Facebook cover photo. Diddums.”
Rule number three: seen something really super awesome cool on someone else’s cover photo? Don’t copy it. This just highlights how really super awesome cool you aren’t.
Rule number four: everyone loves pictures of adorable animals. Especially if those adorable animals are doing human things, such as wearing hats, using computers or eating with a knife and fork.
Rule number five: are you a massive fan of Lady Gaga or of Bruce Springsteen? Why not make a picture of them your cover photo? I’ll tell you why! Because you’ll look like a stalker.
Rule number six: budding photographer? You live in Brighton. Everyone is a photographer and your skills are probably mediocre at best. Even if you are amazing, your friends will probably think you stole it from Ansel Adams.
Rule number seven: there aren’t really any rules. Just try not to look like a massive tool.