Matt Whistler demonstrates his next trick…

Well, what a rambunctious day at my debut art exhibition. All the pieces were displayed with the aid of a spirit level, and Robo Mop was on standby to survey the entire circumference in the manner of a demented pigeon whilst choking on a peanut.

I nipped into the Hop Poles for a wee snifter when on my return, to my dismay, I realised I couldn’t get into the gallery to my own gig. There were globules of humans fixing their eye line on my 2D robots and I was standing outside on the street thinking hmm, what should happen next.

The gallery was full and I decided to go aimlessly wandering around town. I noticed a printers was still open and had my camera with me, so I quickly took a photo of a group of five people that looked like Swiss Horn players with pointy noses and pointy hats with pheasant feathers sticking out of them. The tallest guy looked about 7ft and I couldn’t quite work out whether or not he was in pantomime costume or the real deal.

Anyways, I quickly dived into the printers and payed for an A3 full colour image of this recent camera shot. I ran out of the printers, ran down towards the Pavilion, then ran in front of the group of five and stopped them in their tracks and used my hand out flat when required to stop them proceeding. I then pulled out of my pocket an A3 piece of paper and began to rip the paper in a way that I felt was like an orchestra conductor. I ripped, ripped, ripped the paper, keeping all the pieces in my hand. I then folded the paper into a square and asked them to blow onto the paper in my hand. I stepped back, as if to imply their blowing was of gale force power, then began slowly unfolding the A3 piece of paper to reveal not only a full piece with no rips but the A3 with the large full colour photo of them on it.

The response was appreciated and on my return to the gallery I kept being followed by Robo Mop and just couldn’t shake it off, a small round plastic ball bouncing off my high altitude pressure release boots. Next time I will check my pocket for the key fob to get in, d’oh!