Bare Cheek: A local poet writes

74 year-old Ron Outhouse lives in Portslade; his poetry collections Sixpence For A Dream, It’s Me Again, and I Think They Should Round ’Em All Up And Shoot ‘Em, That’s My Opinion are available from most charity shops. He is a regular (and lively!) contributor to many local newspaper letters pages and radio phone in programmes.

On The Announcement That Brighton Is The Fourth Most Expensive Place In Britain To Buy A House

When I was a young man you could buy
A house here for not much money,
And cafes and shops were cheaper too,
And the weather was always sunny.

But as I grew older there began
The process of gentrification
With luxury flats every bleeding where
Much to my mystification.
Now you can’t buy a screwdriver on Bond Street
Even for ready cash
And posh shops selling meaningless tat
Are everywhere like a rash.

So who is to blame for this state
of affairs?
Who has given this town such abuse?
Well if you ask me, actually
At the bottom of it are those
those bloody….

(The rest of this poem has been “moderated” for contravening laws on anti-semitism and hate crime.)