Tasha Dhanraj feels at a loss without her man

My boyfriend is ill. He has tonsillitis and is taking the same antibiotics I took when I had glandular fever but at a significantly lower dosage. Because of this, it means I have free rein to repeatedly tell him to man up. I haven’t seen him for over a week now and I have become a hermit. I keep asking him to let me come and see him, but he doesn’t want me to get ill just before I go on holiday. Sometimes, selflessness sucks. Without being able to see him, I have not left the house all week. I now realise what an utter loser dating him has made me.

I’ve had two friends’ parties in the last seven days that I said I would go to, but instead of attending either I have chosen to stay at home and watch Nurse Jackie with my mother. One of the parties I would have gone to with him anyway and so I felt bad going without him. The other one was the house party of a friend who my boyfriend has never met, therefore I can’t use his malady as an excuse for me sitting at home and eating tinned macaroni cheese.

“Our relationship is based on two things – food and videos of dogs that can talk”

Most times I have left the house in the last five months it has been to see him, so when I can’t see him I feel completely at a loss. I know I have other things I could be doing, but he’s my favourite person to do things with. Well, he is my favourite second to my family. In fact, maybe this isn’t about him at all. Maybe this is just about the fact that I hate having to see people where I feel I have to bother getting out of my pyjamas. I have a very strict policy of not getting dressed if I’m not leaving the house.

We have the kind of relationship I had always dreamed of. Neither of us makes any effort with how we look or what we do. Our relationship is based on two things – food and videos of dogs that can talk. When I don’t have him to occupy all my time, I am forced to make the decision to either stay at home playing Million Pound Drop Live online or going out and actually having to wear shoes as opposed to slippers in the shape of a cat. I need his tonsillitis to end so he can come here and stop me from having to contemplate leaving the house.